We All Get Stuck

By: LUMO Leaders

- Publish On: February 10, 2022

Hello mothers and others, 

Have you ever had that feeling like there’s nothing to look forward to and every day is starting to feel like a monotonous routine?  I call this being in a “rut”. I find myself there from time to time, and if I’m being honest, more so in the last couple of years. 

My latest “rut” was in January, and I was experiencing my rut deeply – like, REALLY deeply. There was the predictable pandemic trigger – you know, childcare being lost to a Covid exposure coinciding with work filled with timelines and product launches – always fun. But other concerns started piling up on me as well, and I began to have migraines that interrupted my days and nights.  Overall, I was really feeling down; really, really down. And my usual self-care “go to’s” weren’t cuttin’ it. 

For starters – being in a “rut” is normal. It happens to everyone! What I’ve learned over time is that when I’m down it’s my responsibility to take care of myself.  For me, this looks like sleeping at least eight hours a day, exercising, getting outside of the house, catching up with friends, and snuggling with my girls in bed while watching a movie. This time, however, I needed something more. 

On top of my busy time at work and compromised child care situation, I had been having a hard time in some of my closest relationships, and I wasn’t being very nice to myself as a result. My daughter was having trouble with some subjects at school, and I felt like I couldn’t help with her learning experience. And all this put me in a state of deep sadness that bordered on despair. I just didn’t see how things could get any better, and that’s when I realized what was missing – it was a sense of possibility

Yup!  That’s right. I know we use this word a lot here at LUMO, and that’s because it’s one of our core values. Choosing possibility is about choosing to believe that there’s a solution, even if we can’t see it. 

It’s amazing what having a sense of possibility can do when we are down in the dumps. In 24 hours, I went from feeling despairing to feeling hopeful and full of positivity. It was a complete 180. 

What caused this change? I’m gonna let you in on that right now. 

Step one. I took really good care of myself. That meant resting, reading, and really not doing anything but whatever was going to fill my cup. This meant I had to ask my kids, partner, and coworkers to support me. I ended up feeling a little better and getting clear headed about what was really going on.  

Step two. I shifted my mindset. Perspective is a powerful thing. In my case, all I could see were problems that I needed to solve. But once I decided to believe that solutions were out there, in spite of how I was feeling, solutions started showing up.  As Wayne Dyer said, “If you change the way you see things, the things you see, change.”

Step three. I asked for help. I reached out to my community to find support for some of my specific concerns. The ones that were really bringing me down were related to supporting my daughter in her learning differences.  I did some research, had conversations with friends and my coach, and called our pediatrician.  With their help, I was able to find a few options to move us forward in this area. 

Step four. I took action. I found a resource for my daughter, attended an open house, learned all I could about next steps, and discussed plans with both my husband and my daughter.  The outcome was that we found a possibility for a great middle school for my daughter, including a plan B option that we were all excited about.

Outwardly, nothing has changed. I haven’t necessarily resolved any of the things on my plate. But by simply sharing what I needed, I was able to allow people to support me, and I made space for other possibilities to show up. And that has made all the difference.

Yours in leadership and parenting,

Elena & the LUMO team

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